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[desenchanter]

Player Information

Name: Vee
Age: 25
Contact Info: PM
Other Characters: N/A

Character Information

Name: Roxas
Canon: Kingdom Hearts 2
Age: Literally he's only existed for a year, he has the fake memories of being a teenager (both as 'himself' and some of Sora's) and the physical appearance as such.
Gender: Male
Canon Point: Post Twilight Town
Background Link: KH Wiki (KH is coco puffs. If you are confused about anything, and would like clarification, I am happy to do my best to help you out!)
Inventory: Clothes.

Personality:

The point in time that I prefer to take Roxas from has a lot to do with how I represent his personality. There are several reasons for this. The first is his time spent in Twilight Town, interacting as a normal teenager, and the second is his subsequent disillusionment.

TWILIGHT TOWN. Prior to his time in the simulation of Twilight Town, Roxas's only interaction with other kids was from a distance. 'Play' and 'having fun' were completely foreign to him, which could be forgiven considering how recently his non-existence had begun. He used to watch the kids of Twilight Town play with a breathless naivety and desire to understand. In the simulation itself, he's been graced with a set of false memories, which have removed some of this innocence from him, not in a negative fashion but one of experience and age that aren't truly his. He is aware of this discrepancy in his subconscious, and although he has memories of being close friends with Pence, Hayner, and Olette he can actually be quite withdrawn from them. His thoughts and emotion see him drifting into a world of inner uncertainty that his friends can see but not quite understand, and lacking understanding himself cannot explain it to them in order to bridge that gap. He is different from them, in just the way that he has false experiences he cannot quiet explain, his true experiences also lurk beneath the surface, strange and yet familiar. His true experiences are of violence and intrigue as a part of the Organization. Among other children, this makes him wise and assured beyond his years. In his group of friends, Roxas is honestly the true leader. While Hayner is more outspoken, Roxas is the voice of wisdom and is the one who stands up to threats. This mixture of naivety and experience creates a strange mixture of Roxas, always feeling like an outlier.

DISILLUSIONMENT. At the point I like to pull Roxas from, he has already resigned himself to being returned to Sora. His decision to give up his tentative existence does show that he has a very strong moral compass. This does not, however, mean that he does not have some resentful feelings about the process. He wanted more than anything to have his own existence, and now he knows that he can never really have it. His destiny is always to return to Sora, to have no more agency, no more influence, no more experiences of his own. It gives him a melancholiness, something that is only further heightened by what he feels was the betrayal of Axel, the only friend he remembers. If he remembered Xion clearly, he would feel similarly pained over how terribly wrong emotional attachments can go. He wants to feel like he has a heart, to care for others, but he's a little wounded and distrustful of the true motives of others. In truth, however, he's still a bit gullible because he wants to believe in others just that badly. His experiences have tempered him though, he won't immediately trust the way he did when he was drafted into the Organization.

CHILD. Roxas has had a lot of experiences in a very short amount of time. But in the end, even his false memories only encompass youth. There's still a lot for him to learn, and any experiences that he can have, he wants to have them. As a Nobody, he is haunted like the others by a certain emptiness in himself, something that he can almost drown out by being present in the moment and not shying from new experiences. He loves to learn and to challenge himself. This tendency can, however, make him reckless. Truthfully, he views fear as a waste of what little time he has, and is very opinionated. When he gets something into his head, it's difficult to get him to change his mind. He's been badly burned by listening to others, and would prefer to trust his own instincts. Arguing with him when he's made a decision can be magnificent way to set off his ferocious temper. Roxas can and will fight for what he wants and believes in. His beliefs and wants are what he has in the strange ephemeral 'existence' he resides in, he's very protective of them.

QUESTIONING. Roxas is rarely content. As a Nobody, he's felt the weight of the existential crisis, not only that he doesn't know for what purpose he exists, but that he shouldn't. His existence is an unnatural one, one destined to be fizzled out or destroyed. This raises questions for him about the nature of the universe, fundamental questions that no one can answer and this frustrates him incredibly. He doesn't like the answer "that's the way it is," he wants to be able to change and influence things and will do whatever he can to see it done, even if it puts himself at risk. If he can't figure out in what way to make a change, however, it puts him in that melancholy mood, and he will stew and stew and stew over the problem until a solution comes. He's a dog with a bone, he lets nothing go, even if it's poisonous.

TEMPER. Roxas can be a cranky little fuck. He really is quite short-tempered, as I mentioned before he is very staunch when he makes a decision and does not at all stand for others trying to get in the way of it. He can unleash his temper even on people he cares about if they push him too far. With those he has kind feelings towards though, it is more likely for him to be snippy or snide to discourage further discussion if he really doesn't want to have it. Unversed in emotion, anger is really just an easy place to go in order to put others off. He was never really taught better, the way you solve problems in the Organization is violence. Roxas absolutely will not back down from a fight, especially not after regaining his memories of his time in the Organization.

JOY. Roxas's mind is often clouded with unpleasant thoughts. His short-temper is a symptom of unhappy times and betrayal, but he is not devoid of innocence just yet. He is still a part of Sora, who has boundless amounts of love and happiness to give and that is present in his own burgeoning heart. These moments can flare up in Roxas as well. As I've said, he does want to love and have joy, and when he earnestly feels these things, his excitement for it increases exponentially. When he is truly happy, there are no doubts about it, it shows in him brilliantly and it's something those who know him and care for him treasure and admire. Roxas is very loyal to these people, and longs to show them his bright spots. This is directly caused by the slow regrowth of his heart, but doesn't know this.

OUTLIER. Unlike Sora, Roxas has markedly less black-and-white moral views. Existing in a grey area, Roxas has more sympathy and a desire to help others like himself who are being villainized or marginalized just because the world doesn't understand them. This can get him in trouble if you refer back to his gullibility, he could be drawn in by someone dark if they presented their situation to him in the proper light. His opinionated nature and deep loyalty would make it very difficult to snap him out of such a thrall.

THE TRUTH. Despite learning many of his early life lessons from the Organization, Roxas just isn't much of a liar. He's a very earnest and truthful person, even if he were to try to lie the truth usually shows on his face anyway. That's why he states his opinions and beliefs without subtlety, that's why his moments of happiness are so bright. He may evade answering something if he's hesitant to disclose his feelings, or hurt someone else's, but even at the worst of times he would not deceive if it were to make a real impact (a harmless prank might be a different story for a teenage boy though.) In the end though, his feelings, his beliefs, his opinions, his hopes: they're all important to him and he wouldn't cloud them with deceptions. His memories and self-identity have been messed with, illusions and lies surrounding him. He doesn't want any part of it, and he won't like it if he thinks he's being deceived.

SNOWBLIND. The biggest thing to say about how this setting will effect Roxas is this: In kinder settings he can be pretty cutesy. We call it the 'Disney stupid' because he comes from a world with treasure chests and princesses and he's never seen a corpse in his life because everyone just fades away and there's never any blood. He has faced strife though, and we know how he responds to it. He gets cold and steely and shows the crankier side of his personality. This is not a setting that is going to foster his heart into blossoming all beautiful and pure, so his emotions may end up more stunted. (The narrative sample I linked from CDC was a setting where he did have time and space and friendship to foster is heart.)

I don't foresee, or hope for, it to go that direction this time, looking for a change of pace.

He is still, even under his more jaded traits, a good person. He was created from one of the purest hearts in the multiverse, but he will buckle down for survival. This is not a game where I anticipate him eating ice cream with his new friends and watching the sunset in contentment. His lack of experience is going to bite him in the butt and he's going to learn through trial by fire. It's going to suck for him, not only his own suffering but also being exposed to the suffering of those around him. Cause he's a nice kid like that.

Flavor Abilities:

The thing about Roxas is that by the end of 358/2 Days, the regrowth of his heart has started to spark, we see it when he sheds tears for Xion and then rushes off to get his revenge(!!!!!) In KH, a strong/pure heart is fortitude in the face of Darkness (allegorically: fear, pain, uncertainty, greed, jealousy, madness etc). I see this as maybe a bit of increased resistance to going nutso. The heart also involves a certain amount of intuition. In Sora's (and the Princesses') case this reaches a preternatural level, for Roxas--(because he's new at this, so new he doesn't even know it's happened)--it's subtle and fairly minimal. A good example would be some vague nagging awareness that friends are in trouble, or something is wrong in a situation. Nothing too overt.

Roxas is also a bit stronger and more agile than his size and age suggest.

Suitability:

For me personally, Roxas is kind of endlessly suitable to the world of RP. He got his existence cut off short and didn't get to experience much. It is always interesting to pull him back out of Sora and suddenly offer him something to do, it always feels like a bit of a blessing and curse for him and he really has to struggle with the question of whether or not he really deserves to exist. It is also always a little interesting for me to push him into an RP world that isn't as 'cute' as the Disneyland he originally comes from. I'm honestly interested in making him feel starvation, making him feel cabin fever, sickness, death, and things like that.

Like I noted above, he is a bit resistant to losing his marbles. A deeper reason is that he has always had to fight for his sense of self, and is pretty ferocious in it! Which... makes it all the more enjoyable to amp up the pressure until there's a crack.

I'm a creep and I love psychological horror and I like destroying him, I'm sorry-not-sorry 8')

RP Samples: log (CDC) + network (CDC) + log (SB)

I do definitely want to re-emphasize that his life in CDC has a significantly different tone as he's optimistic about using his contract to save his friends and he has had concrete conversation about having a heart, which he has been conscious of and fostering for a year. I'm looking to go with a different tone for SB and I hope the SB sample gives you a good idea of the similarities in underlying narrative but differences in the outward presentation.

Comments

3rd Person Sample

[desenchanter]

--the BIRD.

The snow bunting moves like a piece of debris, its white belly feathers inconspicuous against the snow, its faded brown plumage easily mistaken for nothing more than a piece of bark, a withered leaf. He watches it move in the early morning light. The doors have unlocked and it's time for another day of slogging meaninglessly through the snow and he wonders: Is that what it takes to survive here?

Blend in, become one?

The thought is an ache somewhere deep inside. A hollow, ringing sensation of dread. To give in again, to let his sense of self drift, is the last thing he wants now that he finally has agency again.

But drift it does. The more defiance he shows in the face of Norfinbury's endless suffocating whiteness, the more often he finds himself waking up lost and empty in the depths of a church or a mortuary; adrift like he was when he was first created. Empty of memories, empty of feeling. The numbness is a temptation. And the grander the temptation becomes the more he suspects he's losing himself.

He's never lost that part before, that central kernel that burns bright and defines him as himself no matter what games have been played within his consciousness. The boy from Twilight Town and the nobody from a city of whispering shadows, they were both him, even if they felt separated by a wall of glass within his thoughts.

Both of them had struggled against the universe's unending demands that he just cease to be.

That must be something. That must be something of his, and though the dark safety of the cabin is inviting, it is time to go into the white blanket of the world and fight as it tries to leech all color from him. The snow bunting jumps when he forces open the door, heaving his shoulder against the wood to push the night's snow back. He watches it fly away with tired eyes, trying to keep his certainty of survival aflame as the first horrible gust of wind bites into his face.

He wonders, if perhaps, the bunting has not been subsumed. Merely adapted: to be clever, be efficacious, be quick.

He steels himself against the cold and begins to tread through the snow, looking for footprints but finding none... the night's snowfall has always obscured them from sight. Every morning is a struggle to find a sense of progression, to push from one cold cabin to the next, rummaging with numb fingers for stores of food, over and over again.

Talking to the others on the tablet device was almost like talking to a day dream if they lost track of one another in the sea of disorienting white. After a few days alone, the tablet is an aloof substitute. Its texture in his hands smooth and meaningless--(It reminds him of the company of the lesser Nobodies, the empty blackness beneath their features, their sleek silver forms.)

But he thinks back on the lone snow bunting.

One bird, one mouth to feed. Were they more likely to survive separately? Able to cover more ground, able to find more supplies so that more of them might make it until morning? But of course... there's always someone who doesn't make it, whose luck turns sour, who pushes too far.

Was the survival of so many more worth the lonely deaths of the others?

He's made that sacrifice before: himself for the multiverse. How does one question a virtue they've already given their life for, but the questions ring in the back of his thoughts all the same. Should he be more selfish, this time? Was it selfish, the first time, to ignore the look of pain on Axel's face and push on as he felt he must. Despite the empty state of his heart, it pains him to hear the despairing and the angry and the weakening on that tablet, and it reminds him of those hopeless days when he had tried so hard to save himself.

He tires in the afternoon.

He's been to many worlds, been pushed far too hard, but there was always time for rest, there was never lack of food. The pervasiveness of the exhaustion here is almost a death sentence in and of itself. Your limbs became heavy, disobedient. He sits beneath a barren tree, basking in a cold moment's sunlight and munching slowly on a little bag of granola he had found. It seemed to keep well, didn't moulder, didn't freeze and burn. It tastes like nothing, dry and unpleasant in his mouth.

Nothing much that's pleasant, here.

He let's his head fall back, eyes closed, drowsing in the freezing open, even though he's heard others tell stories of dying that way, never waking up and the heart--the blood pumper--just slowly, softly, turning off. He thinks about the warm array of colors that had been Twilight Town, traces the sloping streets down the hill with his thoughts, imagines the warmth of the late afternoon sun baked into the streets and the rooftops.

He can't decide if the memories are a comfort for their beauty or a torment for their distance.

Norfinbury pulls for his despair and he retaliates, clinging to some strange inner certainty of his defiance, and then the brutal winter punishes him, strips off a piece of him.

Who will he be when the winter breaks?

Has he ever know himself truly.

Is this just another tragedy in which he fades away, or is it a chance--as pitiless as it is--to finally find out what his mettle is.